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Once again, I am here in Peruviaguay, err.. South America with the NT and this time, we are in Peru. Seeing that we are logically dead at Worlds, I decided to pay a little visit to my countrymen a few days before the game. My grandfather came in handy for me and gave me 3 packs of Heineken to get the Nigerian staff drunk. Unfortunately, all they mumbled was something about the crappy soccer team, four-one-nine, or why their rice wasn't growing fast enough. Thirty minutes later, I was on some bus in the middle of Lagos. I got back to Peru 12 hours later, and caught up with the staff. They seemed to be more interested in the pointless game rather than what happened to me.

Me: Hey, you want to know where I was for the past 2 days?
Coco: You weren't kidnapped or raped, were you?
Me: No, but I got chased by an angry mob of...
Coco: That's great, now start shining everyone's shoes.

That's all for now, just make sure to watch the NT battle a bunch of soccer loving guys-turned basketball players at 1:30 PM ET, 12:30 PM CT, 10:30 AM PT. http://www.buzzerbeater.com/country/1/nt/schedule.aspx
(Now if I can sneak some Heineken into their Gatorade...)

Last edited by Big Dogs at 6/28/2012 1:14:14 PM

After me and Big_Dogs finished shining everyone's shoes, we went back to the hotel to go bang some hot chicks. The night was very fun and entertaining, but before we knew it, the morning arrived and it was game day. We were able to switch Nigeria's Gatorade with Heineken as we had planned, and we were ready for success.

During pre-game warmups, Nigeria looked perfectly fine, when they were supposed to be drunk out of their minds. I glanced over at Nigeria's bench to make sure the Heineken was still there, however, it seemed to have a different look. I took a picture of it with my phone. http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/3775/gatorade.jpg I was wrong, it was definitely still Heineken. I didn't know what to do, and Nigeria came out strong. They were up 9-8, when their star player Richmond Sadiq was fouled by Lorenzo Bland, setting up two free throws for Sadiq. Out of nowhere, a fan ran on to the court and punched Richmond's head off, and he died. The fan ran off before anyone could catch him, but I was able to take a picture of the fan with my phone. http://www.acclaimimages.com/_gallery/_images_n300/0061-0... It was Rambo. However, that didn't stop them from scoring, and they had a 33-26 lead at the end of the first quarter.

After a better second quarter, the US was up 46-42 at halftime. Out of desperation, Coco found Tangosz to give the team an inspirational halftime speech. Unsure what to do, Tangosz took out his collection of stuffed animal cats and handed one to each player.

"We need all of you guys to play better, right MEOW! I don't know if you guys are FURmiliar with how to play basketball, and if you are, well then PAWdon me. Let me TAIL you something, you guys are suPURRior to this team, and I'm not LION about it. I need to see more efFURRt out of you guys, because I wasn't FELINE it in the first half."

Tangosz then took all of his cats back and ran away quickly while petting their heads very softly. After halftime, the team caught fire, and they pulled away to win 110-88. Bill Weeks finally didn't suck and he had 17 points to lead the team.

Join us next week at 1:30 ET on Monday to watch us play against Uruguay in a battle to see who advances.


Last edited by moflaffle at 7/2/2012 4:26:41 PM

rawr!