Recipe for ugly player:
1. Blanche a turd in a mixture of 50% bleach, 50% water for a minimum of three days in direct sunlight
2. Gently affix eyes, ears, nose, lips, etc. from a slightly-used Mr. Potatohead, ensuring that the narrow end of the turd is the top
3. Find a tiara and place that on top of the head in place of hair.
4. Enjoy!
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