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The greatest forum posts ever from a legendary forum poster

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This Post:
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241427.3 in reply to 241427.2
Date: 5/7/2013 12:21:26 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
9. (Tie) (221585.7) (7 balls)
Yeah, another recap. Getting repetitive huh? Well too bad. This one was during the Season 20 America's Tournament, where we played against Uruguay. This one was more like one of my normal recaps, in which I attempted to sabotage (And in this case successfully sabotage) that opponent. During this, I made some funnies with the consistent theme of me doing things with ease that would not be done at all in most cases. For example, when I took over a plane from the Buenos Aires airport, I was able to tell the pilot to leave because it was my plane, even though it wasn't, and he listened. Another prime example was when I jumped out of the plane without a parachute and landed on the roof of the hotel without injury. Later in the recap, I revealed the pre-game speech that former NT player Ricky Logsdon gave. Logsdon had just retired from BB due to a horrific injury suffered from deer hunting, and the injuries prevented his speech from being understood. Meanwhile, jfarb, an assistant coach on the team, disliked Logsdon because of how poorly he played on his club team, so tensions were already raised. It ended with jfarb tackling Ricky. This connection of the player-coach hatred continuing on from the past was found to be humorous by readers, which resulted in 7 balls.

9. (Tie) (224328.33) (7 balls)
This was a classic one liner in a Polish national team election debated thread. This came after I made a speech to become national team manager (Which will be coming up in a few posts). The post involved my love of Polish soccer player Robert Lewandowski, which was exaggerated in order to make a connection with the voters, so they would vote for me. Now back to this post. One voter asked me who I thought was the best player on buzzerbeater in order to get some knowledge about how I judge players. This was an easy answer for me, because I could stick with what I had been saying during my speech, that Robert Lewandowski was the best. My decision that he was the best was so popular, that I received 7 balls, so the Polish obviously believed that I would be the ideal manager to make their team the best in the world.

7. (Tie) (220943.2) (9 balls)
Yet another recap here, but this one was an NT one, during the Season 20 World's Tournament against Nigeria. After an unsuccessful sabotage attempt, I was unsure on how to get the US to win, as they were struggling to stay ahead of Nigeria at halftime. Luckily, Tangosz came in with an inspiring speech that involved several cat puns, due to his obsession with cats. This outstanding speech was the sole reason for the 9 balls, and was well worth it. This speech brought the team motivation and led them to a 22 point victory. Tangosz had the potential for a post with a high amount of balls, however, he may have been under the influence of drugs, because instead of saying "Meow", the noise that cats make, he replied with "Rawr", a noise that cats do not make. This caused a bit of confusion, which lowered the amount of balls given to both of us overall.

7. (Tie) (228060.2) (9 balls)
Another recap here, but don't worry, we're almost done with these now. The thing I had going for me in this one was me making fun of real life problems, like the NHL lockout, Pitbull's music, Greg Oden's durability, and Kansas City Chief fans cheering for people when they get injured. Put it all together, and you get a marvelous recap, which is what took place here. The pure skill of the ability to make this all into one, amazing recap without stretching to fit one more thing in there is the reason for the 9 balls.


Last edited by moflaffle at 5/7/2013 12:23:36 PM

This Post:
00
241427.4 in reply to 241427.3
Date: 5/7/2013 12:22:07 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
6. (194602.4) (12 balls)
Possibly the most underrated post on this list, this is a classic moflaffle post right here. BB-Edju made a thread asking if his team was Salisbury's team, because his team name is the Salisbury Auerbachs. I was up to the task of going in depth with what team should be chosen as the representative of being Salisbury's own buzzerbeater team. This was not easy, because there were at the time four teams with the Salisbury label. I could've gone with the quick route of picking the team with the best world rank, but that would not analyze enough. Instead, I went player by player looking for role models, people that the citizens of Salisbury could look up to as idols. It turns out, the Auerbachs have a bunch of lazy players that can be useful, just not in Salisbury, and Salisbury North was decided to be Salisbury's team. My ability to stand up to one of the BB's and tell him that his team just wasn't the best in his city earned me some balls, because it showed that I have balls and speak the truth. Also, I earned some balls because people found this post to be true and helpful, because in Edju's poll, only 7% of voters believed that the Auerbachs were Salisbury's team.

4. (Tie) (208991.3) (14 balls)
This was my speech to run for Polish national team manager for season 19. I ran because they had just won the World's Tournament, and I felt like I needed to sabotage them so we could win. What better way to do that then run for the manager of their team? Now I wasn't gonna just go ahead and tell them that I was gonna sabotage their team. I needed them to believe in me so I could be voted manager, and then I could sabotage their team. However, I wasn't gonna just flat out lie about what I was gonna do, so I put down some realistic goals, like going for a 10% approval rate and making players eat in sync because it would look cool. Then I showed why people should vote for me, and I did not mention in any point in here how I would help Poland's national team get better. Lastly, I knew that they speak Polish in Poland, so I put my entire speech into google translate and pasted the Polish part, to make it look more official. Swag.

4. (Tie) (234011.7) (14 balls)
This prodigious post was in response to another of Mickey LT McCoy's great threads, where you could talk about what managers on BB that you hate. Prior to my post, there had only been two names mentioned, which I thought was rather pussy-like, because there's a lot more managers that people hate on BB. I decided that it was time to throw down everyone that I hate, no sense hiding it. I mean YOLO and sh*t like that. On my list was 31 managers, most of them well known on BB, with relevant reasoning behind each manager such as "Seems like the kind of guy that makes references from movies that never watched" and "Wtf kind of name is that anyway". This post got so many balls, because readers agreed with me on most, if not all names, so they just balled my post instead of rephrasing what I said to make the same message.

3. (222461.2) (15 balls)
My most balled up recap ever, this was for the U21 game against Bolivia in season 20. The outcome of the game was no surprise, the US winning in a blowout, but the biggest news of the week was magiker's random callup of an 18 year old named Michele Bello, who's skills were nowhere near U21 caliber. In my recap, I talked about what it was like having him surrounded by older, and much better basketball players, which revealed that he was often bullied, but I came to his side on several occasions. This heart-warming story of a bond between a manager and a player, despite not even being on the same team, was likely the main reason for the amount of balls that it got. The other reason was bringing back one of jfarb's usual moves in his recaps, having wozz dress up as someone to give a speech to the team, which leads to confusion as people figure out that it's wozz. I am such an amazing w

This Post:
00
241427.5 in reply to 241427.4
Date: 5/7/2013 12:22:34 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
2. (224327.3) (16 balls)
The second and latest of my Polish national team manager campaigns, which took place in season 21, this one was an improvement over the previous one, and it showed. Last time, I feel like I didn't get voted manager because I didn't connect with the voters well enough. This time, I made it evident that I was just like them, I enjoyed polish sausage and Robert Lewandowski. However, like last time, I didn't want to completely lie about what I would do as manager, so I decided to type completely irrelevant stuff such as "I GET BUCKETS. YOLO" and "Did you hear about the guy who's left side got cut off? He's all right now." Then I put the entire thing into google translate for the Polish to read, and the translations seemed pretty accurate. I mean, we all know that "Robert freaking Lewandowski" in Polish is "Robert Lewandowski freaking." My connections earned me the 16 balls, and also earned me 9 votes, so I was close to winning the election.

1. (194704.577) (23 balls)
After seeing everyone posting what they thought were world records over and over again, and with a lot of time on my hands, I decided that I should spend some time going through the entire world records threads to show what actual world records look like. I mean, the name of the thread is Buzzerbeater World Records, so we should be able to see a list of them right? Right? Whatever, now you can, and my long efforts to put that post together obviously got me the 23 balls. However, there is still a lot of people out there who somehow miss the post, even though I also put in in the second post of the thread since people would see it there, and just put what they think are world records when they actually aren't even close. Idiots.

And there you have it, the greatest posts ever from a legendary forum poster. You're welcome for brightening up your day so much. I'm just so good at making forum posts that I thought I needed some more recognition, and we needed some positive stuff on the forums.

If you have any questions or need some advice from me, go ahead and post them in the replies to this thread. I will answer all of them unless they are stupid. Then I might not answer them.

Signing off right here is moflaffle, and remember kids, wear a condom, because you don't want herpes. That doesn't go away.

Last edited by moflaffle at 5/7/2013 1:20:01 PM

This Post:
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241427.6 in reply to 241427.5
Date: 5/7/2013 12:22:47 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
(Reserved)

This Post:
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241427.7 in reply to 241427.6
Date: 5/7/2013 12:22:57 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
(Reserved)

This Post:
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241427.8 in reply to 241427.7
Date: 5/7/2013 12:23:06 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
(Reserved)

This Post:
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241427.9 in reply to 241427.8
Date: 5/7/2013 12:49:56 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
32293229
Wait, is it already the time to elect America's team? I never got my campaign organized.

This Post:
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241427.10 in reply to 241427.9
Date: 5/7/2013 1:21:49 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
761761
It's not about being America's team for me, it's about being Buzzerbeater's Best, which in this case, I am. (Unless you judge by the actual Buzzerbeater's Best tournament, which would show that I am not the best, but that is clearly wrong)

Last edited by moflaffle at 5/7/2013 1:23:00 PM

From: ipsonj
This Post:
22
241427.11 in reply to 241427.10
Date: 5/7/2013 1:53:40 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
7575
(Reserved)

This Post:
00
241427.12 in reply to 241427.10
Date: 5/7/2013 6:03:39 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
926926
Dude it's AP testing this week... how in the world did you write this?

This Post:
22
241427.13 in reply to 241427.12
Date: 5/7/2013 6:05:08 PM
Overall Posts Rated:
504504
I fapped to this.

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