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Pete:
Right now at the half at the Dungeon your Warrior trail the Dragon Unlimited, 34 to 31. Sam Walsh managed to meet up with Coach as they headed into the locker room

Samantha:
Coach, your team is down by three despite having many opportunities to tie or take the lead, what will your team have to do to get ahead in this one.

Coach Stephenson:
It’s about boards, plain and simple. This is game is just gonna be a good ol’ fashion gorilla ball slug fest. Whoever controls the interior and whoever controls the boards is gonna get the win. Right now that’s them. We knew this, we knew they have a high scorer and they have a silverback. Our silverbacks just have to get in the pit and outwrassle ‘em. Plain and simple Sam.

Samantha:
You heard him Pete. Basically this is going to be an ugly interior battle and the Warriors are going to have to find their grit if they want the win. Right back to you.

3. Super Sonics (3)
EFFG:2 | OPP EFFG:3

Number of Transactions: 7
Profit: $982.9K
Spent: $612M
Result: $370.9K

Awesome ranking, but where did I get 612M from? LOL I must be LA Dodger of basketball where all those money is defer after ten years.

Charles:
I’m Charles Sanborn and if you just tuned in, Warriors wear down the Dragon Corp to leave the Dungeon with a 88 to 72 win. Yes the Warriors won by 16 but this game was closer and more sluggish than the final score will tell you. The Warriors lost the first two quarters, the first 17 to 16, the second 17 to 14. They were being pushed around in the paint. Asil Anil“Packrat” Pakzat and his friend Qu Yu Zi were true silverbacks, just snatching boards like it was leaves falling off trees on an autumn day. The two alone gave the Dragons second chance possession after second chance possession to keep the game more difficult than it really needed to be.

In the second half two things happened, the first Tercero finally did what the Warriors needed to do in the first half. Hit a three. But Tercero did it on the defensive end too, he made a big stop and then LAB Baiao finally started to work. Chris O’Brien, coming off the bench managed not to get in foul trouble and thus was able to do what he did best: get boards. But he added something else: a big three to tie the game at 57

In the fourth, the thing that Stephenson wanted to do all game finally started to pay off. The three silverback rotation of Big Turk, Begin, and O’Brien started to gain an edge on a weary Yuzi and Pakzat. The Dragons couldn’t really go to their bench for size and the Yuzi and the Packrat as Stephenson calls them ran out of bullets and juice. Ranger Granja finally woke up after a couple of steals, one of which actually was turned into points to finish with a double double of 10 pts and 10 rebounds. A stat that probably thoroughly describes this game. At the end of three, Granja had six points , couldn’t seem to hit a barn from ten feet much a basketball hoop, and there was concern that the post game report would start with should Granja come off the bench.

Samantha:
Yeah the difference a quarter can make. For three straight league games the question has been will Ranger Granger show up. Fortunately for Granja, the Warriors bench managed to inspire him enough to remember who he is and get on it. But the win doesn’t change the fact this Warrior offense seems rudderless at the moment. Fortunately again the Warriors’ bench kept them in the game long enough to wear down another opponent and finish the first half of division play in a good position.

Bret:
That’s spot on Samantha. The Warriors …

Samantha:
Oh what is this incident involving Gordo and a chair that Brian told me to ask you about?

Bret and Charles sigh

Charles:
Ok. I’m going to explain this and record this so anyone who keeps asking will have a reference and stop bringing it on air. So you remember the NOFF game right?

Samantha:
Sure

Charles:
Which I guess is appropriate because tonight game was very similar to that game. Though I still vouch that the NOFF game is probably THE sloppiest game played by either the Lion Rebels or the Warriors and yes I’m including their founding years because your first years you’re suppose to be sloppy. But both of these teams in season 60 were seasoned veterans and have caliber seasoned coaches.


Last edited by Coach Stephenson at 12/24/2023 1:20:01 PM

Charles:
Any way. February 21, 2023. Lion Rebels and Warriors in the SMG. Score was 66-50 and ironically enough the last time the Warriors have won in the series. Warriors went 27 out of 89, 4-19 from 3 point land. The Rebels somehow were worse gong 19 out of 81 including 3 out of 26 from beyond the arc. I ‘m curious. What did the Warriors shoot for tonight?

Samantha:
36 of 92. About 39%

Charles:
Yeah see despite all the wasted opportunities the Warriors wasted tonight, they still shot better tonight than they did that game in which the Warriors shot a lousy 30% overall. This game stunk. So of course the players were a little bit chippy afterwards. Now most stories want to say it started with Armstead and Parrish. It kind of did, but not because those two did anything bad. In fact Parrish was telling Armstead this story in which to demonstrate something he pulled his hand back from Armstead. Well Dick Parent of the Lion Rebels saw this and thought Parrish was being disrespectful and started towards Parrish mouthing a few choice words. Valladares sees Parent heading towards his teammate and he moves in. Now fortunately a Rebel assistant coach saw Parent and went to cut him off, but soon Valladares arrives and the assistant coach uses his forearm to keep Valladares away from his guy.

Now the camera eventually showed that the assistant coach never touched Valladares. Unfortunately that wasn't the angle Gordo was seeing things from. From his viewpoint, the assistant was pushing on a Warrior player, so Gordo who has always been a hothead, lowers his head and charges to back up Valladares. Now another Lion Rebel assisstant coach, I can’t remember the name at the moment. But he sees Gordo charging and he grabs a chair.

Now the only reason insantiy doesn’t break out is because Gordo while half way on his charge, is tackled by Bret here.

Samantha:
Wait! You were there?

Bret:
(sheepishly)
Yeah.

Charles:
Bret was doing guest commentating and was taking down equipment when he saw it all happening. Now you’ve seen Gordo, you know is 6’11” and built like Charles Oakley. Bret is 6’7” small forward/power forward hybrid. After that everything calmed down and the teams eventually went to their respective locker room.

Samantha:
And did Stephenson or Coach Blaine ever found out?

Charles:
Oh of course both found out. It was the next day but both coaches eventually heard about it and dealt with it. With that being said. We’ll go to a commercial back and when we come back we continue discussing the Warrior's win over the Dragon Unlimited before opening the phone lines. This is the Warrior’s Den on the Warrior’s Sports Network.

Last edited by Coach Stephenson at 12/24/2023 1:12:37 PM

lol - oof - that’s a bad typo!!

Pio Reina and Roberto Gurgone are having their post game assessment.

PR: We did not generate the steals we needed or force the turnovers we hoped to. Our turnovers held steady at about where we’ve been. We knew we’d lose on the boards; that’s why we needed to generate more steals and turnovers. It was something to try, and the players were glad to run it. Ultimately, we don’t have enough to have that as a real option right now.

RG: OK. Give me your view on who can on this roster.

PR: None of our current guards. Weinstein might develop into one. Farley is the closest to being one.
Enfes can at small forward. Kops needs a bit of work but that should be doable. Reynolds needs work but isn’t far off either. Hatfield is the only big who can. MacNeur is closer than Koncki, but we also don’t have that shot blocking presence.

RG: What are we looking to gain this week developmentally?

PR: None of our guards are worth spit on the boards except Farley. Any improvement helps.

RG: Fair enough. By the way, I agree with your assessment.

PR: Well there’s more. Marshall thinks Kops is better served at guard. I don’t disagree, but I think he needs a bit of work before that can happen. I’d like to see his handle tighten up and his range improve.

RG: I figured you’d want him at guard. What about Enfes?

PR: If he sees time at guard, he needs to tighten his handle, improve his range, and decision making with the basketball. We also need him to finish better at the rim. At some point in the not distant future, we’re going to have them on the court together.

RG: That was the vision. I’m working on some things. Short term, you’ll hate me. Long term, I think you’ll see we’re on the same page. You good with losing Shooter?

PR: I’m prepared to lose any and everyone. I trust if we do, it’s for a reason. I’ll adapt.

RG: It’s not a sure thing, but it’s something I’m looking at. Depends on some other things. I’ll see about getting you some defensive help.

PR: Thanks. Now to deal with Air and his nonsense...

“I see you guys trying to attack the rim and get to the foul line. I see you guys causing 30 turnovers and generating 27 steals. Nice to see you pick up on certain necessities when playing the backwards game. Now, can somebody please tell me what happened to my rebounding? Never have I ever seen such a putrid display on the boards. Never mind that we expected that outcome on the boards; we did not expect the bigs to just not show up on the boards at all. We also didn’t expect you guys to give up 80 points in the first half. Now, you got better as the game went on, and that fourth quarter looks nice on the sheet, doesn’t it? A 40 point quarter and we only gave up 21 is good, right? I mean, except for losing by 23, right? At least it’s better than losing by 24 like we did Saturday night, right?” Pio was not happy, but now wasn’t the time for anger. He was trying to teach a lesson.

“Coach,” Tovar began, “I’m not sure we understood the purpose of what we were doing this week. It wasn’t made entirely clear to us. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I‘m confident when I say the guards were not clued in on what the point was from the start. We kind of pieced it together after talking with the other position groups and assistant coaches. All we got from Coach Motormouth was ‘just get through this week in one piece and things will go back to normal’.”

“You shut your lying mouth, Tovar!” Allnite did not like that at all.

“Or what? You gonna tell us how you were so good shooting you didn’t have to do anything else? You gonna trash talk everybody else and not coach them up? Aren’t you the same guy that told us Monday in practice that, and I quote, ‘this week is all about letting the bigs get their rocks off by beating the guards around; all you have to do is survive’? Do I have that right?”

“That’s exactly what I said.” Air was incensed now. “I didn’t know you were so shallow that you never realized big guys like to take guards down low and beat the hell out of them. You think they like chasing you at the three point line on switches? This is how they get their revenge! If our guys rough you up and that’s too much for you, what do you think other teams are gonna do to you? Sheesh, this generation is just soft! Byron, when you got a chance to take a guard down low, what did you do?”

Helm smiled. “Punish them.”

“Marshall, what did you do when you had a guard on you?”

“Took guys like you in the paint and beat the snot out of them.”

“Pio, you were known as a defender. What did you do best?”

“I guarded the opposing team’s best scorer. If they wanted to go into the paint, I could make things a little difficult.”

“Back to you, you little pissant. When Guyton and Knowles were running the backcourt and you were running your mouth about being the best shooter on the team ---and by the way, you weren’t--- did you ever wonder why you didn’t get any run when Knowles or Mantas played some small forward? It’s because of your defense. You also can’t do spit inside. You can’t rebound, you can’t score inside or finish at the rim, you don’t defend. You’re useless. So, yeah, let the bigs beat the crap out of you. You either learn to survive, or you don’t. Learn to survive and you make the team better. You ain’t that good of a shooter to survive with just a pretty jumper, and yours ain’t that pretty.”

Day 8 (Tuesday 26 December 2023) : Performances by (https://www.buzzer-manager.com)

Night results
Dragmort Dragons Utd 69 - Super Sonics 86
San Dominica Warriors 73 - Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️ 56
Lion Rebels 126 - Fort Wayne Pistons 86
Shandong Golden Lions 117 - Balls to the Walls 59
F.Day Internet Lovers Club 113 - CB Bethesdorf 101
Linndale 113 - Tasty Tardsicles 136
Muffin Men 90 - VileOnes 77
209’s MostWanted 66 - Jumpstop Jumpers 100

Best collective performance of the evening
Points : 136 : Tasty Tardsicles
Rebounds : 73 : Tasty Tardsicles
Assists : 41 : Tasty Tardsicles
Steals : 27 : Linndale
Block Shots : 11 : Jumpstop Jumpers

Personal best performances of the evening
Points : 41 : G. Hilliard (Jumpstop Jumpers)
Rebounds : 24 : C. Webber (Muffin Men)
Assists : 11 : G. Izaza (Fort Wayne Pistons), H. Giles (Jumpstop Jumpers)
Steals : 6 : P. Farley (Linndale)
Block Shots : 6 : L. Praznik (Jumpstop Jumpers)

Top 5 of the evening
Point Guard : D. Conaghan (Tasty Tardsicles) (16 Points, 2 Rebounds, 10 Assists, 1 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 24
Shooting Guard : K. Brown (Lion Rebels) (28 Points, 0 Rebounds, 7 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots), C. Sârbu (Shandong Golden Lions) (20 Points, 5 Rebounds, 4 Assists, 2 Steals, 1 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 28
Small Forward : G. Hilliard (Jumpstop Jumpers) (41 Points, 10 Rebounds, 2 Assists, 0 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 38
Power Forward : T. Tovar (Linndale) (35 Points, 5 Rebounds, 5 Assists, 5 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 35
Center : P. Tai On (CB Bethesdorf) (21 Points, 22 Rebounds, 5 Assists, 0 Steals, 1 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 43

MVP of the evening
P. Tai On (CB Bethesdorf) (21 Points, 22 Rebounds, 5 Assists, 0 Steals, 1 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 43

The bad performance of the evening
J. Deems (Fort Wayne Pistons) (2 Points, 0 Rebounds, 0 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : -5

All kinds of statistics
The player who forgot to remove his mittens : G. Reinhardt (Fort Wayne Pistons) : 8 Turnovers

Player targeted by the referees : V. Abat (F.Day Internet Lovers Club) : 6 Personnal Fouls

The iron-man : S. Starr (Dragmort Dragons Utd), M. Albright (Dragmort Dragons Utd), A. Runcie (Dragmort Dragons Utd), R. Gordillo (Dragmort Dragons Utd), R. Braswell (Dragmort Dragons Utd), M. Lahaye (Super Sonics), E. Grantham (Super Sonics), A. Guilla (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), V. Abat (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), A. Durham (VileOnes), G. Hilliard (Jumpstop Jumpers) : 48 Minutes

The shooter : E. Piana (F.Day Internet Lovers Club) : 7 Three points

The best performer : T. Freeman (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️) : Rating : 20.0

The worst performer : E. Grantham (Super Sonics) : Rating : 4.5

My team took a beating with these injuries and tough competition.

Roberto Gurgone and the coaching staff met before practice. “I take you’ve heard and have questions or grievances. Let the airing of grievances begin!” Air Allnite was first. “Have you lost your ever-loving mind? What on earth do you think I‘m supposed to do with the guards you left me? Those rookies ain’t ready; and the veterans?!? I’m a basketball coach, not a miracle worker!” Roberto expected this. “Cerri is shooting a healthy .451 and is tied for third in the league in assists. Tovar is shooting .470 and .571 from deep, and averaging 18 a game. Jimenez has Weinstein are projects, and as their position coach, you are absolutely expected to be a miracle worker. Did you think this would be easy? Marshall, what do you got?”

Marshall was to the point. “Air, I’m sure we’ll continue working over Tovar every chance we get, but those rookies are going to need to suffer to get any better. If you don’t want them, give them to me. In the meantime, Enfes still has a use for a lot of work at guard. Kops has use too, but we’re gonna work him over in the paint.”

Byron Helm was next. “We gotta get the bigs back to basics. Gotta get stronger. Air, when we gonna get Damian and Josh to your shooting camp? Add the new guy, too. Marshall’s gonna want the new guy on the wing; I can see it at times. We got the makings of a very nice group in the paint.”

Roberto waited to hear from his head coach. Pio didn’t make him wait long. “By the end of the season I’d like Jimenez Weinstein close to playable as a backups. Enfes will be a better passer. Kops will stronger. I want the inside defense and rebounding strengthened. We have the horses to do it without adding to the inside. Do it. We have an 8-man rotation. The rookies are not ready. Air, expect reinforcements at some point. That should get us to 9, maybe 10. My guess is that Pemwieser and Hatfield are going to be sources of turnovers, but the overall turnover situation should be cleaned up. Priority is on the inside improvement. That’s going to be the huge focus for the rest of the season. Defensively, Beko is the straw that stirs the drink. Improve the rebounding, the defense gets better. We’ve just greatly improved the defense. So fixing the rebounding and improving the inside offense is key. I feel good with where we’re going. Air, the pressure is on. Turnovers need to come down, shooting needs to improve. Byron, rebounding needs to improve. Marshall, you’ll assist both. Roberto, care to have a little fun and join me in the lab? You are uniquely qualified for this one.”

“I’ll have the calls routed to your office; still a few things I’m working on. What are we working on?”

“It’s time to update the backwards game. We can do more things now...”

Week Four Power Rankings & Notes
We're officially 36% through the season with 8 games down in Season 63. This week we're looking back at week one's ranking and how each team has progressed. I hope you all had a merry Christmas and are enjoying something of a break over these few days before New Years. (Quick programming note - for EFFG a + change is positive, while for OPP EFFG a + change is negative. EFFG should be high, and OPP EFFG should be low.)

(Buckle up - I've been off all week, so I got REAALLY wordy)

1. Lion Rebels
Week 1 Ranking: 1
EFFG: 137.5 (no change)
OPP EFFG: 73.8 (+8.8)

The Rebels held out against the Golden Lions on Saturday night thanks to a dominant 2nd quarter, holding them to just 16 points and then surviving a dreadful 3rd quarter before both teams finally came alive in the 4th, collectively scoring 56 points to finish out a very even matchup. They didn't have much of an answer for Choi Kwan who had 28 points on 65% shooting to go along with 21 points. A trip to Fort Wayne proved fruitful as they held the normally very efficient Pistons to an EFF of just 77, which is 43 points below where their average was heading into that matchup.

Next Up: Balls to the Walls at home and then at CB Bethesdorf

2. Tasty Tardsicles
Week 1 Ranking: 6
EFFG: 146.9 (+0.4)
OPP EFFG: 81.8 (-38.2)

Tasty's Week 1 Ranking was a result of their being ranked 11th in OPP EFFG, but they've cleaned that up after their first two difficult matches to extend their unbeaten streak to 8. They came out the gates hot at CB Bethesdorf last weekend, scoring 66 points to CB's paltry 31 in the first half, and despite giving up 40 points in the final quarter as Bethesdorf played catchup, they held out for a 14 point win. They hosted a bewildered Linndale after that and were even more dominant, scoring 84 points in the first half before giving up 47 in the final frame as Linndale caught up to only lose by 23, trimming their 49-point deficit. Vino Bachelier had his best game of this season, scoring 25 points on just 12 shots, including 6-6 from the charity stripe (we'll ignore his game high turnovers).

Next Up: at F.Day Internet Lovers Club and then host to Shandong Golden Lions

3. Super Sonics
Week 1 Ranking: 10
EFFG: 136.3 (+3.3)
OPP EFFG: 78.4 (-52.6)

An even more impressive improvement in OPP EFFG, the Sonics' acquisition of Stanislaw Fabis is proving monumental as he's had 79 rebounds in the five league games he's started, including 23 in their overtime victory over Mindless Zombies this week. It might not seem like much, but Fabis is only averaging 27.7 minutes per game. So, while he's currently only 5th in rebounds per game (at 13.3), extrapolate that up to even just 36 MPG, he'd be at 17 RPG, which would put him 2 boards more per game than the current leader (Golden Lions' Choi Kwan). At any rate, they beat Mindless in a close fought game, and Dee-Jay-Tee's probably correct in that his injured AC Carečina hurt his chances of knocking off the Sonics (more on that later). And then the Sonics took their backups at home against Dragmort for an easy win as they prepped for a Cup matchup against the #153 USA team.

Next Up: at 209's MostWanted and then host to F.Day Internet Lovers Club